Happy International Blasphemy Rights Day!

This is International Blasphemy Rights Day, and y’all will probably not be surprised to learn that I am a strong supporter of blasphemy rights. The more blaspheming the merrier, I always say.

I favor speaking ill of the supersized-human god of the Old Testament, the smarmy god of the New Testament, and Alvin Plantinga’s “ground of all being” — whatever that is supposed to mean. I’m fine, too, with people who speak ill of cows (beloved by Hindus), rats (beloved by other Hindus), vultures (beloved by some Zoroastrians), and magic crystals and incense (beloved by New Age nutjobs).

I don’t have a problem, either, with people who wonder what sort of deformed human being would want to spend eternity with the inventor of Hell. I’m cool, also, with people who frankly acknowledge the incontestable fact that Joseph Smith was a con artist, and that those who don’t know it are mor[m]ons. I’m allright with ridiculing Jehovah’s Witnesses, too, because they’re still trying to puzzle-out why the godly weren’t whisked to their reward in 1917. Provided you’re armed, have a good giggle at the idea that Muhammad galloped off to heaven on a white horse. And while you’re at it, flick your nose at Valhalla, where Norse warriors go after their career of carnage and mayhem down here on earth.

Just don’t make fun of Paul Bunyan. I’ll kick your ass, you do a thing like that.

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